Thanks to Pop Secret for sponsoring this post. All funny commentary is my own.
As you may be aware, we just (as in about 5 days ago) moved into a big, beautiful new house. It has everything our old house didn’t like closets and central air. Along with all these astounding modern amenities the house also came with a microwave, which is something of a miracle to me since I’ve lived my whole adult life without one.
I could never get one because my first apartment had no countertops. No exaggeration. It was basically the size of a smallish walk-in closet, which by New York City standards was luxurious. When we bought our first home we had slightly more countertops, which is to say we had countertops. But an old house with five doors in the kitchen, didn’t leave a whole lot of room for counter space. Now as I reach midlife I finally live in a house with space and countertops. And let me tell you, it’s amazing.
All this is my way of saying for the past 20 years I’ve never been able to have popcorn. Do you know what that’s like?
It’s a travesty.
I suppose I could have popcorn if I wanted to settle for crummy, store-bought, already-been-popped popcorn. But I don’t settle. I’m better than that. I wanted real, live, fresh, delicious, pops of corn that inflate before your very eyes into fluffy puffs of salty goodness. Which these days can only be had if you own a microwave. And, that’s all I ever wanted a microwave for, really. Popcorn. That’s it.
All this time I’ve held out for real popcorn so when I was asked to do a post about Perfect Pop from Pop Secret right before I was about to move in to a home where I could actually make popcorn, I was like, Are you kidding me? This has been my dream for 20 years. It’s all I’ve ever wanted to do (well, that and a few other things like write a book, but popcorn was the main goal). And, now I finally can.
I’m proud to say the inaugural use of the microwave was to make Pop Secret popcorn with the Perfect Pop app, and you know what? The only thing better than being able to make warm, buttery pops of corn in the comfort of your own home is making perfectly popped pops of corn in the comfort of your own home. Because nothing’s worse than opening the bag after the giddy anticipation of eating the mouth-watering, buttery delight just to find every last piece burned. Especially when you were so looking forward to stuffing your face after inhaling the intoxicating scent as you eagerly awaited the microwave bell to ding. And all it took was one second to ruin it all.
It’s the kind of devastation you just don’t recover from. Sure, you might try to eat around the burned parts out of a fierce desperation and false hope that you’ll find one or two salvageable pieces, but you’re just fooling yourself. The damage is done. The happy, fun evening you envisioned is spoiled forever.
Well, those days are behind us. Pop Secret has created The Perfect Pop app that telepathically communicates with your microwave and dings at the precise moment your popcorn is ready. It’s magic. Or technology. Which is basically the same thing.
Before I even finished reading the email on how to get the app on my phone, my daughter had already downloaded it (because she’s all teenage like that), but you don’t need a teenager to do it. It’s super easy. Then we tossed the popcorn in, played the app and were regaled by movie trivia. As the popping neared completion, we saw “the view” inside the bag, adding a dramatic build-up to the final moment.
I gotta say the app doesn’t lie. There was not one burned morsel in the whole bag.
Look how delicious it was.
I think Crazy’s trying to drink it. That’s how perfect it was. We’ve been eating it nonstop ever since.